{"product_id":"what-drives-you-workshop","title":"June 13 - What Drives You: Core Fears, Core Needs \u0026 the Roots of Reactivity","description":"\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-3 -mb-1 text-[1.125rem] font-bold\"\u003eSaturday June 13, 9-11am PDT, 5-7pm UTC\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"text-text-100 mt-3 -mb-1 text-[1.125rem] font-bold\"\u003ewith option to stay from 11-noon for Q\u0026amp;A, practice and small group coaching\u003cbr\u003e(session 5 in a 15-week Relationship Mastery series)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 class=\"text-text-100 mt-3 -mb-1 text-[1.125rem] font-bold\"\u003eWhat Drives You\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-3 -mb-1 text-[1.125rem] font-bold\"\u003eCore Fears, Core Needs \u0026amp; the Roots of Reactivity\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eHave you ever reacted to something your partner said — and known, even as it was happening, that your reaction was bigger than the moment deserved?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eHave you ever found yourself in a familiar argument, thinking \u003cem\u003ewe've been here before\u003c\/em\u003e — same feeling, different day, different words — and not understood why you keep returning to this place no matter how hard you try not to?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eHave you ever been suddenly flooded with emotion — shut down, lashed out, gone cold, or dissolved — and afterward wondered: \u003cem\u003ewhere did that come from?\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt came from somewhere. It always does.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis workshop is an invitation to find out where.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-2 -mb-1 text-base font-bold\"\u003eWhat's Really Running the Show\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBeneath the surface of every adult relationship, there is a landscape that most of us have never fully mapped: the core fears and core needs we formed in childhood, in the earliest relationships we ever knew.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eLong before we had words for what we were experiencing, we were learning what love felt like. We were learning whether our needs would be met or ignored, whether we were safe or in danger, whether we were worthy of closeness or somehow too much — or not enough. And from those early experiences, we built an internal operating system: a set of beliefs, strategies, and reflexes designed to help us survive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe problem is, that operating system is still running.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eAnd it's running your relationships.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eNot because you're broken. Not because you haven't tried. But because these patterns live deeper than intention, deeper than willpower, deeper than the communication frameworks you've learned. They live in the body. They live in the nervous system. They live in the part of you that still, in certain moments, is responding not to the adult in front of you — but to something much older.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eUnderstanding this changes everything.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-2 -mb-1 text-base font-bold\"\u003eWhat We'll Explore Together\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWe begin by looking honestly at the \u003cstrong\u003ecore fears\u003c\/strong\u003e that most commonly drive reactive behavior in relationship — the fear of abandonment, of engulfment, of not being enough, of being too much, of being controlled, of being invisible, of being known and rejected. You'll likely recognize yourself in more than one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eFrom there, we turn to the \u003cstrong\u003ecore needs\u003c\/strong\u003e that correspond to those fears: the deep human longings for safety, for belonging, for respect, for autonomy, for mattering, for being truly seen. These are not weaknesses. They are the universal architecture of the human heart — and learning to name them with precision is one of the most liberating things you can do.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWe then move into the present moment — learning how to \u003cstrong\u003eempathize with what's alive right now\u003c\/strong\u003e in your own experience, and how to begin tracing the thread between a present-moment activation and the older pain it's echoing. Not as a way of living in the past, but as a way of finally being free of it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eYou'll develop a clearer map of your own \u003cstrong\u003ereactive and conditioned responses\u003c\/strong\u003e — the predictable patterns that show up when your core fears get touched — and begin to understand them not as character flaws but as learned survival strategies that once made perfect sense and can now be gently updated.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eAnd throughout the session, we'll work with the practice of bringing \u003cstrong\u003ecompassion to the younger self\u003c\/strong\u003e — the part of you that first learned to love and be loved under conditions that were never entirely fair, and who is still, sometimes, doing their best with the only tools they had.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-2 -mb-1 text-base font-bold\"\u003eYou'll Leave With:\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eA clear understanding of the core fears that most commonly drive reactivity in adult relationships — and the ability to recognize your own\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eA vocabulary for the core needs beneath those fears, and what it feels like when they are met versus unmet\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eSkills for empathizing with your own present-moment experience with precision and compassion\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eThe ability to begin bridging present-moment reactions to their roots — so you can respond rather than repeat\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eA more compassionate relationship with your conditioned patterns, understood now as survival strategies rather than personal failures\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003ePractices for working with the younger self — the inner landscape where so much relational learning first took hold\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eA felt sense of what becomes possible when you finally understand what's been driving you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-2 -mb-1 text-base font-bold\"\u003eWho This Workshop Is For\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis session is for anyone who wants to understand themselves at a level that actually explains their behavior — not just describes it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt's for the person who keeps replaying the same relational patterns despite their best efforts to change. For the partner who knows they're overreacting but can't seem to stop. For the one who shuts down when things get intense, or escalates when they feel unseen. For anyone who has ever asked themselves \u003cem\u003ewhy do I keep doing this?\u003c\/em\u003e — and wanted a real answer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eIt's also for coaches, therapists, and helping professionals who want a deeper framework for understanding the relational wounds their clients carry — and more precise language for working with them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eYou don't need any prior experience with attachment theory or inner child work. You simply need a genuine willingness to look honestly at yourself — and the understanding that doing so is not an act of self-indulgence, but one of the most loving things you can offer the people in your life.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003ch4 class=\"text-text-100 mt-2 -mb-1 text-base font-bold\"\u003eA Note from Your Facilitators\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eThis is one of our favorite sessions to teach — and one of the most tender.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eIn fifteen years of working with couples, we have seen again and again that the arguments people think are about dishes, or money, or time, are almost never actually about dishes, or money, or time. They are about the fear of not mattering. The longing to be chosen. The old wound of feeling invisible, or controlled, or abandoned.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eWhen someone finally sees that — really sees it, in their own experience, in the present moment — something softens. The story they've been telling about their partner starts to loosen. The story they've been telling about themselves starts to loosen. And something becomes possible that wasn't possible before.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eThat's what this session is for. Come with an open heart. You may be surprised by what you find — and moved by how much compassion becomes available when you finally understand what's been driving you.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e— Scott Catamas \u0026amp; Katrina Vaillancourt, Love Coach Academy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr class=\"border-border-200 border-t-0.5 my-3 mx-1.5\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePart of the Relationship Mastery 15-Week Training\u003c\/strong\u003e | Also available as a standalone workshop \u003cstrong\u003eSaturdays, 9:00–11:00am PDT (5-7pm UTC) with the option to stay from 11am-noon for additional Q\u0026amp;A, practice, and small group coaching\u003c\/strong\u003e | Live on Zoom | Replay available\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"We Are Human Kind","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46434818424993,"sku":null,"price":97.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0686\/6196\/9057\/files\/RelationshipMastery5.jpg?v=1778793166","url":"https:\/\/www.wearehumankind.love\/products\/what-drives-you-workshop","provider":"We Are Human Kind","version":"1.0","type":"link"}